I want to be your warrior, but you hurt my friend.

I last wrote about warrior women, and how they’ve looked out for me all my life, sometimes unappreciated and unnoticed.

I want to be a warrior for someone, I really do. I know more than one person who has been hurt recently, and I know the women responsible have their own stories and their own reasons, but my friends are hurting.

I’ve tried to see the other point of view and to make excuses, but there is also something called loyalty. If you hurt my friend, I need to be strong for him. Is it wrong that I’m taking the man’s side in both situations? Part of me understands the break up and the hurt the women must be feeling, but my inner warrior wants to be there for my friends. I feel their hurt more.

So, ladies, I think you already have your own band of warriors to help you through this time. My friend, my long time friend, has his buddies, but he has my support, too. I don’t know how many women friends he has, but I’m not taking your side just because you are female. I might consider reaching out and getting your side of the story, but my husband is not feeling very conciliatory towards you right now. You gave up a chance at our compassion when you laid this on our friend without warning, refusing to even get marriage counselling.

To the other lady who has hurt my friend, I don’t know you very well and I haven’t known you very long. I liked you and thought you were good together. Now it’s over and again, I’m sorry, but I have to be a warrior for him. He is like a son to me. I will not talk to you about him and neither will I ¬†trash talk you to him. I’ve let you know that I’m here and don’t blame you, but it’s in your court. I will not act as a go-between. I will not betray his confidences, nor will I betray yours if you choose to share them with me.

What I’m saying is that I can be your warrior if you need one, but my priority is my friend.

I guess what I’ve learned through this is that men need warriors, too. Boys and girls need mothers and strong female role models as well as good male role models. Friends need friends who are in their corner, male or female.

If you hurt my friend, male or female, I will be there for them.